Monday, October 19, 2009

Unconditional Love

Unconditional love, for obvious sake, means to love somebody unconditionally.  This can mean for better or for worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health... you get the idea. Unconditional love is the basis of a marriage and when most people say "I do", I believe they feel that they do love each other very deeply, but is it unconditionally?

Let's take an example:
Say you are going out on a date with your significant other after the two of you have been going crazy with work, school, kids, etc. So you take this opprtunity to "gift" your partner by getting all dressed up, and even wearing that heirloom piece that isn't your style, or isn't very comfortable. Hopefully this isn't your wedding band, but if so then that counts.

When you finish you seek out your partner to show off the glamourous or dapper "you"! For some reason, though, your love of your life doesn't take much notice or doesn't seem very excited, even at the self-sacrifice of wearing their heirloom trinket you really cannot stand!

Do you feel hurt? resentful? unappreciated?  These are valid emotions, ... except in the case of unconditional love. That is not to say that unconditional love means you should suffer just because your prince (or princess) charming needs a good solid whap upside the head with a cluebat!

The issue, though, is that it wasn't done with unconditional love; there were strings attached.  You had unwittingly attached the strings of being wow-ed over and flaunted with affection and admiration from your lover and when you didn't get it your felt hurt.  You actually did it all for you, and for your own pride and when it wasn't received you threaten a form of retaliation such as not showing any affection for the rest of the night or by not allowing them (and you) from enjoying the night because of a storm cloud over your head all night.

Doing it with unconditional love means that no matter what or how much you do in the name of love, there is no recourse or punishment if it doesn't work out as you expect. You give, and that is the end of that and if anything comes of it great, but otherwise you don't hold anything in your heart if it does not. In this, the only ones that need to know how much effort and sacrifice you put into this effort is you and God.

Ideally your partner does notice your effort and does praise you accordingly.  In this situation you have your full rights to enjoy every ounce of praise and flaunting! In this manner, the praise you receive are more genuine which makes them a thousand times more powerful than one guilted out of somebody against their will.

Did I say it was easy?  No, it is not easy and is especially hard when there is a disconnect or there are issues in the relationship.  Even in good relationships, this level of giving of yourself is not easy to do and is even harder to do it every day.  To love unconditionally means with no strings attached, no expectations and no regrets.

On the other hand, when two people love each other unconditionally is not only a beautiful thing, it forms a union stronger than the sum of the parts.


Drew said...

Yes, I know I am taking a deviation from my usual computer/Linux subject.

Since my laptop suffered an untimely demise due to an altercation by a cup of water, I am in the process of revamping the desktop as the primary and the would-be server as the secondary and figuring out the best set-up to satisfy all users.

Once I get things going again (possibly get a cheap netbook?) I'll probably be back with tech-related blog posts.


sinaisix said...

Hi Drew, it's good to take a break once in a while from our blog 'subject' and talk about something else in life.

You know, I have always been of the view that the term 'unconditional love' is more of an utopic concept than anything that can be seen in real life- at least the life that I have seen in my few years on earth.

I don't think there can be any form of love without some conditions, be it implicitly or explicitly. I am yet to read or hear of such love and if there is, I hope to find a woman who will show me that kind of love lol